Earthstar Cookies

In memory of the little boy who touched our hearts

Last week was a sad week. Two of our loved ones passed—our grandmother and our pet turtle, Earthstar.

Neither passing was a surprise, as both had been ill for some time. What surprised us was the depth of our sorrow over Earthstar. I did not expect the quiet ache that settled in the house, or the way my heart would feel so suddenly hollow.

Earthstar was no ordinary turtle. If I ever doubted that animals can form emotional bonds with humans, I do not anymore.

He was happiest when we approached his tank. He would splash and follow us like a small, determined dog. He made deliberate eye contact. His front paws fluttered together, and he pressed his small mouth against the glass as if trying to kiss us through it. We learned that this “front paw flutter” maybe a turtle mating dance. The object of his devotion was us—especially CC1, who brought him home nearly 25 years ago.

Earthstar began as one of three baby turtles sold by an old woman in the alleys of New York’s Chinatown. Only Earthstar survived. Somehow, that fragile beginning turned into nearly a quarter of a century of companionship. He grew alongside our family. He witnessed seasons of our lives. He brought us more joy than a small reptile should reasonably be able to give.

For the past two years, he had not been well. CC1 (with the help of all of us) poured her heart into his care—filtered water systems, bottled water for his tank, veterinary visits and a surgery, even tiny injections in his back flipper for nearly a month. He did not enjoy them, but he seemed to understand that the pain was rooted in love. And Earthstar gave that love back in his own unmistakable way.

This winter, Earthstar came back from his home with CC1 to stay during the holidays, and we decided not to move him again. He looked frail and was barely eating.

A few days before CC1 returned for her grandmother’s funeral, Earthstar stopped eating entirely. He buried himself in the corner at the bottom of the tank, eyes closed most of the time. The stillness was frightening. I thought he might leave us at any moment.

When the girls came home Thursday night, Earthstar stirred. He swam forward to greet CC1, offering his delicate front paw flutter once again. The tenderness of that moment was almost unbearable. It felt like a final act of devotion—a parting gift to the human he loved most.

On Saturday, the four of us buried Earthstar in our snow-covered front yard. It was a bright, clear day, the kind of winter day that feels both stark and beautiful. CC1 wanted to return him to nature. Earthstar had always hated being placed in a box during the many trips between his two homes. It felt right to set him free in nature’s embrace.

We miss you, Earthstar. The void you left is deeper than we anticipated. The joy you brought us—and the love we felt for you—will remain woven into our family for a very long time.

We took a walk afterwards and checked out a newly opened café, crowded and buzzing with life. We did not manage to order anything, but one oversized Italian amaretti cookie caught our attention.

Back at home, I tinkered with a few recipes, adjusting a King Arthur version to lower the sugar and amp up the orange flavor. The result was a generously sized and distinctly shaped cookie—crisp on the outside, soft and chewy in the center. Beautiful and deeply satisfying. Everyone asked for seconds before the first batch had even cooled.

We named it the Earthstar Cookie.

Grief and sweetness now live side by side in that name. The pain of that day will stay with us. But so will the sweetness of love.

Rest in peace, little boy.

Ingredients

• 3 cups (288g) almond flour

• 85g granulated sugar

• 1 cup confectioners’ sugar for coating

• 1/4 tsp salt

• 1/2 tsp baking soda

• 2 egg whites

• 1 tsp almond extract

• 1 tsp vanilla extract

• Generous amouts of orgnage zest (I used one large orange but probably can use more)

• 1 tsp orange liqueur (or 1 tbsp orange juice)

• 1/2 tsp orange extract (I didn’t have it but will try next time)

Instructions

• Preheat oven to 325°F.

• Line baking pan with parchment paper.

• Combine almond flour, sugar, baking soda, and salt in large bowl.

• Use the back of a spoon to incorporate orange zest evenly, and then repeat with the almond, vanilla and (orange optional) extracts, and finally the orange liqueur/orange juice. Mix them thoroughly in the almond flour mixture.

• Whip egg whites until stiff, and incorporate into almond flour mixture to form a sticky dough.

• Wrap flattened dough with plastic wrap and refrigerate for at least an hour.

• Cut dough into even pieces, form 1-1/2 inch balls, and dip each ball into powered sugar ending with a generous coating.

• Pinch each round dough into desired shape, and add a small dollop of jam in by pressing a divot in the dough as desired

• Bake for about 25 minutes — until the cookies are golden brown.